How to Know if You’re Experiencing Religious Trauma (and What to Do Next)
- Dominic Schmuck, Ph.D., ABPP
- Oct 3
- 4 min read
You are likely reading this because you suspect that something about your past (or current) religious experience is still haunting you. Maybe you’ve left your religion but can’t shake the guilt or keep worrying about "What if I'm wrong?". Maybe you’re still involved in your faith community, but constantly feel anxious, afraid of judgment, or unsure of your worth. Or maybe you’ve noticed that no matter how much distance you put between yourself and religion, certain teachings or memories still echo in your head.
You may be wondering:
“Am I overreacting?”
“Is this just normal pain from my changing beliefs, or something deeper?”
“How do I know if I have religious trauma?”
What Is Religious Trauma?
As a psychologist specializing in religious trauma, I am happy to provide some guidance here. Religious trauma happens when the very system that was supposed to offer you community, purpose, and safety, instead leaves lasting harm. Sometimes this comes from overt abuse in a religious setting (e.g. sexual abuse). Other times, it’s the quieter but relentless weight of guilt, perfectionism, fear, or pressure to conform.
In psychology, trauma isn’t defined by the event itself - it’s defined by the impact. It’s about how those experiences live on in your nervous system, your emotions, your relationships, and your sense of self.
Too often, people assume trauma only “counts” if it looks like PTSD. While PTSD symptoms (e.g. flashbacks, nightmares, exaggerated startle response) can occur, you don’t need to meet that clinical picture to still be experiencing real trauma. In fact, most religious trauma doesn’t come from one singular traumatic moment. Instead, most commonly religous trauma builds over time, through repeated, internalized messages that erode your self-worth, make you doubt your value, and teach you to distrust your own thoughts and feelings. Those messages can still echo today, shaping how you see yourself and how you live your life.
Signs You Might Be Experiencing Religious Trauma
Not everyone will experience these in the same way, but here are some common signs I see in my clients:
Persistent Guilt or Shame: You feel “never good enough,” even for things that aren’t moral issues. You may catch yourself apologizing constantly or feeling guilty for simply existing.
Fear of Punishment: Even after leaving a religion, you may feel an underlying dread that something bad will happen if you “sin,” break a rule, or even think a certain way.
Difficulty Trusting Yourself: If you were taught that your thoughts, feelings, or body were untrustworthy, you may struggle to make decisions without external approval.
Perfectionism & Hypervigilance: You’re always scanning for mistakes, trying to control yourself (or others) to avoid shame, judgment, or rejection.
Relationship Struggles: Setting boundaries feels hard. Intimacy may feel unsafe. You may avoid talking about beliefs with family because it always turns into conflict. You may also be very conflict avoidant.
Flashbacks, Nightmares, or Triggers: Certain songs, scriptures, or settings bring back memories or feelings you wish you could escape.
If you see yourself in some of these, you’re not broken. You’re responding to conditioning that shaped you deeply.
What You Can Do Next
Recognizing that you may be experiencing religious trauma is the first step. For many people, even using the word trauma feels uncomfortable - especially if they didn’t go through a single, obvious event like military combat or sexual assault.
But trauma isn’t limited to PTSD. Trauma doesn’t always come from one defining moment. Often, it’s the cumulative weight of harmful teachings, fear, and shame that shape how you see yourself and move through the world. That means while you probably shouldn’t claim the term PTSD unless you fit the diagnostic criteria of PTSD, you can absolutely claim the word trauma.
And if you still feel hesitant, remember: you don’t need to fit a certain mold for your pain to be real. What you’ve gone through matters! Here are steps you can take to begin healing.
Name It Out Loud: Simply putting the words religious trauma to your experience can help you finally make sense of what you’ve been feeling. It’s not about blaming yourself for “not moving on fast enough.” It’s about recognizing that what happened to you left a real imprint.
Reclaim Your Story: Religious trauma can make you feel like your life was scripted for you. Try to work through old narratives and reclaim your sense of agency. Make your own choices! If needed, therapy can help you reclaim yourself you’re no longer living by someone else’s rules.
Find People you can Trust: Whether it’s supportive non-judgmental friends, online communities, or therapy, connecting with people who understand (or at least don’t dismiss your experience) is crucial. Healing doesn’t happen in isolation.
Practice Boundaries: If you haven’t already, start saying “no.” It’s okay to step out of conversations, decline invitations, or limit contact when interactions feel harmful. Boundaries aren’t rejection - they’re self-respect. They also protect you from building resentment and create space for healthier, long-lasting relationships.
Seek Professional Help: Religious trauma often overlaps with symptoms of anxiety, depression, and even PTSD. A therapist trained in religious trauma and faith transitions can help you manage symptoms, build coping skills, and create a life that feels authentic.
Stop Minimizing Your Experience
I want you to hear this clearly: what you’re feeling is real. You don’t have to minimize it, and you don’t have to carry it forever.
I’ve worked with countless individuals navigating religious trauma, especially those leaving Mormonism and other high-demand faiths. I know how overwhelming it can feel! I also know how healing, clarity, and even joy can return when you have the right support.
Take the Next Step
If you’re wondering whether therapy might help, I invite you to reach out:
*If you don’t see availability via the button above:
📞 Call/Text: 385-200-0204
📧 Email: dominic@truupsychology.com
I can work with clients in over 40 states (see the states colored blue on this map).
A Little About Me
At TruU Psychology, I specialize in therapy for faith transitions, religious trauma, relationship trauma, and professional issues. Many of my clients seek therapy for anxiety, depression, life transitions, relationship struggles, or professional challenges - but they also want a therapist who understands the unique dynamics of high demand religions.
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